As I’m preparing to go home, I am filled with a very difficult mix of emotions. I am so happy and grateful for the time I’ve had here, but it hurts my heart to leave. I have formed many strong relationship with people here, nationals and missionaries alike, and it is unfortunately highly likely that I may never see most of them again. I will be able to keep in touch with most, and might even be lucky enough to meet up with some of the US missionaries in the future, but I cannot count on seeing my national friends again.
I have gotten quite close to three ladies here: our hausmeri, Kitty; a coworker of mine from LCORE, Rudy; and Jotty, who works at the high school, but I met her in Ukarumpa village. The upside is that all three of these women are believers, so we will be together again in heaven, but it still breaks my heart to leave them. I know that I leave them in God’s capable hands, as well as those I did not mention, but it doesn’t lessen my sadness. I am full of the joy of the Lord, but still acutely feeling an earthly sorrow. Prayers for my strength would be appreciated. The is a good church in Ukarumpa village, so I am confidant that the locals there will continue to be influenced by people who love them like I do. There are still around 300 language groups that are without a translation program in the works. Pray for these as well when you think of me.
I must admit for you all to understand the depth of my emotions that I am tearing up just thinking about leaving these beloved friends of mine. I will see Jotty again tomorrow, perhaps for the last time, but she has an email address so we can keep in touch. Kitty will be here tomorrow as well, so that will be the last time for me to see her. Rudy lives next door and I will hopefully see her a few more times before I leave.
I am tempted to say that it is cruel for me to get to know and love these people and then possibly never see them again, but I have faith and joy that go beyond this world, so I do have a profound peace about leaving. I stick by the psalm tattooed on my foot. Psalm 57:7. God is faithful and righteous in all things, no matter how hard they are.
I spent several hours in Ukarumpa village yesterday, just talking and hanging out with people. I don’t think I will ever be more welcome or safe than I am in the village. Everyone there is a friend to me. They are just so happy that I am willing to spend time with them and they don’t even know that it’s a blessing to me too. I had a conversation with two ladies I had just met and they asked how long I had been living on the SIL center. Two months, I told them. “Two months or two years?” Months, I replied. They went on smiling and laughing, telling me how good my Pidgin is and that they were impressed. It was a blessing because that is often where I feel the most inadequate. I am not fluent in Tok Pisin by any stretch of the imagination, but God surpasses all language barriers. A toddler, Indina, grew quite fond of me and she was content to sit with me and feel my hair and skin until her mother finished a round of volleyball.
I was glad for one last chance to sit and talk with the villagers, but I think it made it all the harder to leave. I would have regretted not going, so it is for the best, even though it hurts now. I will miss long afternoons in the sun watch games of volleyball and chatting with people, some I know well, others I don’t know at all. Adults are happy to approach me with abandon to introduce themselves and talk or just simply shake my hand. Kids will watch me from a distance before coming close and wanting to play with me. It’s truly beautiful.
Okay, I’ve rambled enough and my peace has increased from this introspection. I look forward to seeing you, my friends and family in the states, but until then, keep my heart and safety in your prayers.
No comments:
Post a Comment